Military Archives: A Marines Diary P.2.

2008, January 26, Saturday.

Mother went to Lancaster to fix the house she just bought and says it looks beautiful. Went to a Chinese buffet with the family, โ€œMom, January, Flower, Jesus, Peter, Mark, Anna, Lucy, & Ethel.โ€ Peter is looking for a new apartment because he might get evicted. his roommate moved out without notice and took all the money. watched the labyrinth at my sisters house. my nephew mark called me his best friend. he looks up to me a lot.

I went to a rave in San Bernardino, because thatโ€™s the thing to do at this time in age. Everyone from ages under 18 to over 50 were there. I mean, people who could be my Mom and Pop are dancing around. I think they may be high. The music is great, the people are beautiful, but itโ€™s a trap! People taking ecstasy are destroying their brains. You quit smoking cigarettes today. This writing is proof to reflect on your promises in order to succeed to your full potential. Self-medication will no longer be an issue and your mom would be proud.

If it were an issue sadness and heartache will occur for you and your mom.

(Note to Reader- if you have an addiction and want to quit, do it for you. If you quit for others you are guaranteed to fail.) 

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Keep on growing, pushing through and maintaining good habits. The people that went to the rave were: Nestle, Yoshi, Ed, White guy, White girl, Anthony, Jeff, Ray, Michael & Peter. You battled in a dance circle and got complimented by Ray. Then you got to see him dance, and pop & lock. To my surprise he is really good at dancing. Tooshay.

After I battled in the dance circle I noticed I lost my wallet. I walked to the police overseeing the rave across the street and tried to report my wallet lost. They flashed a flashlight in both my eyes and told me to take a nap with my keys on my lap before driving home. . . They thought I had been drinking?! Silly cops, I was sober the entire time.

Military Archives: A Marines Diary P.1.

2008, January 25, Friday.

My first annotation on my daily journal. Today I woke up at 0600 and headed to the Physical Fitness Course(PFT) at Lake O’Neill. The run was the most difficult for me, because I had never been good at running. I believe what helped me push through without slowing down was the positive thinking overcoming my negative thinking. Repeating words in my head like, โ€œpush… go, go… almost there… Corporal promotion.โ€ Once I saw the finish line I sprinted toward it with all my energy, and got the score of 280 like I wanted. I made Iron Man.

Went to Central Issue Facility(CIF) to exchange flak gear and had to drive back twice because of my forgetfulness โ€œADDโ€. Second time there I waited over an hour to get my flak inspected just to get turned away for a little dirt on my flak; also known as a bullet-proof vest. Cleaned the flak with cold water and coca cola in washer. Then I hang dried it. Went to a restaurant called Pizza Port in Carlsbad for a Platoon function. It was for all the Marines getting deployed. Amber has a good heart, i’m disappointed i didnโ€™t get to know her better.

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Started to drive to LA at 1700; Smooth drive. Got to my destination at 1900. Talked with mother about her neglect of me as a child. Explained to her that the communication she uses around me tends to have negative connotations more often than not. I explained to her how she looks to point out the bad things within the relationship. This in turn gives me bad feelings every time iโ€™m around her. I figured if we spent more time being open about our feelings we would be able to fix our relationship.

Hanged out with friends while they searched for โ€œparty favorsโ€. They failed to find any. Went to a table reading where actors read a script and pretend to act in front of an audience. They are pretending to pretend. Wow, what a mind-boggling meta thing to say.

Journal Ten: A Free-write

Journal Ten: Unfiltered Free-write

I recommend everyone have a journal or diary that they can write their emotions and feelings in. Freewriting is just one style that allows one to write their emotions without being too critical of oneself. I find that when I over analyze myself I end up not writing anything worth remembering.

It helps to release inhibition and let thoughts flow. It helps to be mindful.

Bed pull the thrills legs come and chill red blood and guts donโ€™t forget love remember love butt anal people create trauma to the soul as insanity flows pen mold creation of life sold to the world government owned cereal flake piece of cake Marilyn Monroe Charles Manson bill Kennedy Freddy Krueger spit a lugar at boot camp drill instructor recruiter tranced in boot her pants come foot her dudes bleed red in the head Afghanistan saves the den leg deadhead lost in dread space time continuum bed closing eyes cloud nine rhyming lines freestyle mind communication prime mental diamonds cut lungs trying to quit lying to my shits dying coughing brian crying lying dying from sighing writing till dying. dead.

Reynaldo Rivera Jr. (2009)

I wrote this free-write in 2009 when I was in the Marine Corps. I have a bunch of journals that I have been trying to write into a book, but I’ve been hypercritical in how I want it to look in the end, which in turn has made me put off completing all the entries. This is a little snippet of one journal entry; journal ten.

๐Ÿง™